I think we all go through a constant ebb and flow of life, and I also believe it’s neccesary for personal growth. (Ebb and flow is a rythmic pattern of coming and going, or decline and regrowth.) I have been terrible at keeping up with all the demands my life has lately, and really slacking at running our business. I have so much I need to get done, and to be honest I’m not sure what’s stopping me.
I have been trying to spend a lot less time online, and spending more time with all my family and friends, and just being present. But when I do have extra time, I’ve found myself relaxing instead of getting done some of the many things piling up. Maybe it’s because I’ve been working so hard that my mind and heart just need a break, but it’s felt nice. I’ve definitely taken a big step back from my presence online, and it has felt so good! I really love, and want to continue what I do, I just think that this wave of regrowth is headed a different direction than before.
Because of my goal to grow so quickly on here I feel like (at times) I was going against some of my own advice. (To create quality not quantity.) I’ve sometimes posted things just to post because I felt like I had to keep up with the algorithm, or every other influencer on here. Silly, I know. From now on, instead of forcing myself to post everyday, I’m going to be extra intentional about everything I create, and make sure it’s nothing but my best work at the time.
hah. I think every blogger intends on doing more than they put out. Writing has always been a passion of mine. I’ve written songs, poetry, or even just random thoughts since I was a young girl. I want to start writing everyday. That sounds a bit crazy.. (and who knows if I’ll keep up) I don’t even know what I’m going to share. It’s most likely going to be short snippets, but I want to write everyday. I don’t even care if nobody reads it, I just want to put it out there in the universe.
My true self—
again I feel like lately I’ve been going against my own advice. To be COMPLETEY, AUTHENTICALLY ME. I definitely have always tried my best to be authentic in who I am. Maybe even I have been/still am not completely sure who that is. I think it’s one of the reasons I love creating. It forces me to have to dig deep into myself to find ideas, and inspiration. I have been finding recently that I’m buying things, or doing things when I have no other inspiration just because others are. I want to stop that cycle and really be intentional, and thoughtful of every interaction, purchase, creation, etc.
Ive always thrived off of change, and I wonder if I’m constantly changing things in my life because I’m trying to find out what my composition is? I think I’m still figuring myself out. I feel silly admitting that on a public forum because I’m looked up to by many, and married with a kid.. I should know who I really am right? When in actuality the only thing I really know is that I’m a daughter of a king who loves me, and cares for me. That’s the best thing to know, but above that I don’t think I’ve really figured much out. The rest of this year I’m going to really try to find myself, and my composition. My personal style in apparel, style, interior decor, health, and so much more.
Thank you for reading my rambling thoughts, and supporting me in my personal journey. ✨